Parent Waves

What’s in a name ?

parent waves : naming

Carrying the weight of history, heritage, and hopes, choosing a name can seem fraught with difficulties.

All cultures place huge significance on the act of baby naming, and in many traditions, naming is itself a spiritual act. In creation stories from Christian to Hindu, and Aboriginal to Native American traditions, the world comes into being only when the unique name of an object is uttered out loud.

The divine syllable “om” was the first sound and brought everything in the universe to life, say the Hindu scriptures. Aboriginal creation myths tell of birds, plants, animals, and rocks springing into being from nothingness as their names are sung.

In the Pueblo tradition, the mythical figure, Thought Woman, imagines everything in the universe, but nothing exists until she gives each object its name. A name empowers us with identity and connects past, present, and future.
So which name will you choose? Maybe you will dip into your hereditary pool, rich with references formulated over generations. In parts of Ghana, to bestow the name of lost loved ones brings those ancestors back to life, sowing the seeds of their attributes in a new tiny being.

In other places, family names reveal a child’s background: his line of descent, social standing, and family position. Balinese tradition locks a child’s gender, caste, clan, and birth order into four names before giving a fifth “personal” name.

 Despite having an intensely personal meaning, a name is  a very public thing.

Grandparents and grandchildren are often yoked together by a name; for example, in England it has been common since the 1700s to name a first son after his father’s father and a second son after his mother’s father. The Edu people in Nigeria honor grandfathers and great-grandfathers by having them officiate at naming ceremonies or choose the name.

Elsewhere, too, the choice of name is out of parents’ hands. Sikh families attend a ceremony at their gurdwara where a page is picked at random from the holy book as a prayer is said. The first letter of the first word on the left-hand page gives the first letter of the baby’s name.

In China, each of the five elements: metal, wood, water, fire, and earth, are represented in a name by a character or a word with the qualities of that element.

In many cultures, a name is thought to influence a child’s future life chances, behavior, and accomplishments. In China, the number of strokes in a written name is said to determine the child’s fate. While in early New England, virtues were handed to daughters—Patience, Prudence, Charity—and in Victorian Britain, names of illustrious or noble people were popular, hence the many Victorias, Alberts, and Clives.

Auspicious names with an amuletic quality, such as Lucky, that augur well and offer protection from ill-wishers are common in parts of Africa. Sometimes they deflect evil by invoking laughter. For Islamic parents, a name is a thing of beauty, denoting an honorable quality, innate goodness, or devotion to God.
Jameela, for example, means “good character” and “beautiful.” Christians might choose the name of a saint for whom they feel an affinity or whose feast day is near the birth.
The Yoruba people believe each name has a spirit that lives through a child regardless of his nature. This chimes with parents who wait before giving a name until a child shows him-or herself—through looks, demeanor, or spirit—to be a Ruby, Rufus, or an Apple.

Made-up names reflecting topicality and celebrity culture are big in some parts of the world, for example, Briella, a US hit in 2011—though daughters are more often recipients then sons.

Boys’ names tend to remain stable. William has been in the top 20 US names for over a century, although there are changing trends: once neglected Old Testament figures such as Jacob, Elijah, and Noah have enjoyed a surge in popularity recently, challenging previously popular New Testament names such as Matthew, Mark, and Luke, more commonplace in the 20th century.

In some countries, parents select from a state-approved list. Denmark’s Law on Personal Names gives 7,000 standard names. Parents can seek permission for another name through the church, and the case is investigated by officials. Sometimes a name arrives at birth.
Eskimo birth attendants recite names as the child is pushed out: the infant “chooses” his name by appearing when called. Luo babies in Kenya stop crying when “their” name is recited. In Ghana, a child takes a temporary “birth” name of the day of the week; and the elements of a Chinese name can reflect the hour, day, month, and year, connecting an infant with his horoscope.

A naming ceremony offers families a chance to gather and renew ties. Regardless of spiritual heritage, this is a time for new beginnings and hope. Some parents create custom ceremonies, appropriating customs from different traditions and starting new ones.

In a “baby-wish whisper,” each person whispers to the baby what they would wish her to take through life: a loving disposition, appreciation of music, gentleness, and so on. Attendees may give a personal name, as is common in Nigeria and Ghana, or chant a song with the name, as in Hindu naming ceremonies, or for the Saami people, blessed by parents with a “joik” or “acoustic symbol” personal to their life.
Sharing a feast, giving a name, and wishing a child health, long life, and prosperity, entwines lives and enfolds the new babe into family and community.

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